Peony Time

The peonies are extremely happy this year and are putting on a spectacular show.

Joy

Family. Friends. A warm house. Enough to eat. What else is there?

We're Pretty Lucky

Every Thursday evening in July and August there are free concerts at Red Rock Park in Lynn, which is within walking distance from our house. In previous years we've taken advantage once, or maybe twice, but this summer we've made it a habit to grab some takeout or bring a light meal, a blanket and listen to whichever band is performing. Even if the music isn't our style it's great to sit outdoors on a warm night, overlooking the ocean, watching people and listening to a live band.

By attending every week we've come to recognize other regulars: the crazy woman who dances all alone in front of the band, the older group that appears to be doing aerobics, and the kids who run around and play in the grass. It's all part of the fun.

Last week as we were munching on Mexican takeout, listening to the band and watching the sailboats in the harbor our friend Brian said, "we're pretty lucky to live here". Indeed we are, and it's good to be reminded.

Tribute to my Dad

For Father's Day I want to give credit to my Dad, who is responsible for giving me many of my best traits.

One of my earliest memories is of telling my father I wanted to be a secretary when I grew up. He replied: "you can be anything you want to be, not only a secretary." At the time I was probably 4 or 5 years old and it didn't mean much to me, but it was something I never forgot. As I grew up I had no doubt that I could opt for any career path I desired.

My dad is a very hard worker; I'm sure he gets his work ethic from his own parents, and so on back through the generations. It's nice to think of the past being carried down through the family tree in such a way. Relatives I'd never even known, some I've never even heard of, are patchworked into my DNA and will continue to be carried on in future generations.

When my brother and I were young my dad would work long hours, sometimes not returning home until 8 or 8:30 pm. I'm sure he wanted nothing more than to have a bit of peace and quiet after 14 hour day, but we clamored to have him spend time with us, which he always found the energy to do.

He loves animals and from him I learned to have our pets "talk". Some might call this anthropomorphism or even crazy, but for us it was just something we/our animals did. We had a lot of laughs doing this; our dogs Parrish, and later on Max, would come up with some interesting comments and/or thoughts.

He has a great sense of humor and i think from this I have learned to see the funny side of nearly any situation. One memory is very clear for me: During a long hospitalization I had when I was 19, my dad happened would come by at lunch time to keep me company. Despite it being a difficult time for my family with my illness and lots of uncertainty, we found humor listening to the ribald elderly man in a room across the hall, who loudly recounted the story to a visitor of "having a tube shoved up his ass". This struck us as incredibly funny and we couldn't help but break into laughter. It wasn't so much what he was saying (well, yes, it was that too) but the fact that he was practically yelling it for all the world to hear, on top of the fact that we tried to stifle our laughter, made it all the funnier.

We learned financial responsibility at a young age and one of the most important lessons I got from my father as not to buy something you couldn't afford. Saving up for something was the way to go. With credit, you ended up paying more for a purchase than it actually cost, if you didn't pay off your bill each month. I'm very grateful he passed on this wisdom, it has been one of the most important pieces of advice I've received.

We both share a love of gardening and the outdoors, in fact, my dad's father had an amazing vegetable garden. Any successes I have in the yard I can no doubt credit to my genetic makeup and also probably absorbing information unconsciously while watching my dad dig in the yard as a kid.

I'm thankful for all the traits I inherited from my dad and can't imagine having anyone else for a father. Happy Father's Day, Dad, I love you!

Treasured Gift

This bellows belonged to my grandmother, my parents gave it to me for my birthday. As a kid I loved to use it to blow air into my, or more likely, my brother's face. I've always been fond of it and was very excited when it was passed along to me.

I'm not sure of its history, other than that it was painted by my grandmother's dear friend Molly, who was quite talented. The back of it has my grandmother's initials: SEB. It will be hanging next to our fireplace with our fire implements and I'll think of my grandmother each time I see it.

Random Happiness

Here are some random things that make me smile:

Purring

The wisp of smoke that floats out when you open a bottle of good root beer.

Daffodils

An unexpected phone call/pop in from a friend

A sunny day after a week of rain

Babies

Ice cream

Joe and Wilson

Lavender

The smell of rain

The sound of the ocean

Down comforters

A clean house

Watching birds on the feeder

The first sip of coffee in the morning

A great book that I can't put down

The smell of freshly mown hay

Chocolate

to be continued.....

Tribute to my Mom

The day is dawning with clear sunshine and a blustery spring wind--making the new leaves dance and the daffodils bob their heads. A lovely day in tribute to mothers.

I hope my own mom had a restful sleep and wakes up to the bright day feeling happy and at peace with the world. Everything I am, I owe to her thoughtful and patient presence. Both she and my dad worked hard all their lives to make sure my brother and I had everything we needed, but always kept us in check and taught us to appreciate what we had, not to be excessive and to enjoy each day fully. We were taught by example and allowed to make some mistakes, always with their loving support in the background.

My mother has been blessed with a generous, loving spirit; an eternal optimist she is always able to present a positive facade, even when things are difficult. She is able to handle challenging transitions gracefully and make the best of what she has been given. I hope I will be able to navigate life in such a manner, but she is a tough act to follow.

She taught me how to knit and sew with incredible patience, often interrupting her own work when I was young to correct a mistake I had made and get me back on track. From her I inherited my love of learning, reading, travel, the outdoors and family.

When W was younger and I was sick she'd drop everything to come stay with us and take care of everyone, putting her own busy life on hold. She knew how important it was to me to have the stability of routine and made sure that things were kept as normal as possible. Though the circumstances weren't the best, it was wonderful having her here and being able to spend the time together,memories I'll always treasure.

Even though we won't be together today, I wish her every happiness and a day filled with love. We will set aside a special day in the near future to get together to celebrate Mother's day, something to look forward to. (Most holidays are "floating holidays" in our family due to my parents' busy schedules). Happy Mother's Day, Mom, and thanks for everything you have done for me. I love you!

Peaceful, Easy Feeling

What a nice weekend. The weather has been perfect, 65F, sunny and perfect for working outside or taking a walk on the beach. Or both! Saturday was a productive day and we enjoyed a yummy Mexican dinner out with good friends at night, then walked around the Willows park in Salem. Still as tacky as ever, with a large biker crowd in the arcade. Great fun people watching. It was a beautiful evening, no bugs out yet and just a slight breeze. We were able to walk down to the end of the pier with our ice cream cones and enjoy the great weather. The perfect ending to a lovely day.

Today has been a day to putter around the house and work in the garden. I started out early this morning, even before doing my treatments, which was a nice change in schedule. Usually I don't allow myself to do anything until after they are done, so it was a treat to be able to head right out into the garden and attack all the weeds that have sprouted in the last couple weeks. After a couple solid hours of work I had finished clearing one bed out back and was ready for some breakfast and then my treatments.

Joe and I took a long walk down by the beach, all the way to Red Rock park and back, which was a stretch for me since I haven't been able to exercise in a couple weeks due to the flu. No more slacking, time to get back to it! The walk was tiring, but it was a good kind of tired. I did a bit more work outside and then sat down to appreciate my handiwork. It's so nice to look around and see the results of your labor! I get a lot of satisfaction from outdoor work.

So I'm left with a nice, contented, peaceful feeling this Sunday night. It's been a lovely weekend, a perfect balance of socialization and solitude, relaxation and work. I don't think it gets much better than this.

Final Presentation

Yesterday was W's final presentation for his FME class at college, wrapping up the last course for his freshman year. Only finals remain! Family was invited so of course Joe and I wanted to be there. I picked Joe up at work and after sitting in heavy traffic for longer than we planned, we found the building and got to sit down in the audience just as it was starting.

I was so impressed at how poised, pulled together and professional this group of young adults was. The presentation was an hour long, they discussed in detail the process of forming their business, the structure, challenges within the company, the selection of their product, marketing and then finally, sales. It was truly a hands-on approach, in my opinion, the best way to learn. Theory and background are important, but at some point you just have to dive in and do it. There will always be challenges and mistakes but it's all part of the process. Everyone learns differently, but I do believe this is one way that truly benefits every person.

It's so hard to believe that freshman year is over. It seemed like just yesterday we were moving W into the dorms and adjusting to his being away. I'm so proud of the way he has handled the transition. Not only has he done so gracefully and enthusiastically, he has truly flourished in the college environment. It makes a parent proud!

Thought for the Day

The greatest part of our happiness depends on our dispositions, not our circumstances. - Martha Washington

A friend sent me an email with this quotation at the end of it and I liked it so much I thought I'd put it in a blog to better remember it.

Today was a gorgeous spring day in New England, 60 degrees, light breeze, sunny and the air smells so fresh and clean. The crocus are just finishing up their show, bright bunches of purples, yellows and white that add color to the otherwise drab gardens. The grass is still brown and only the tiniest of shoots are coming up where the perennials will be later on this spring.

We've had some typical weather for our area over the past week; a chilly ocean breeze has been keeping us cooler than it is inland. There have been clouds, rain and drizzle most days so today it was heavenly to see the sun and have some warmer temperatures. A nice hint of what is to come after the next batch of rain we'll be getting. What's that saying? April showers bring May flowers? I can't wait!

Every Day is Valentine's Day

Love it or hate it today is Valentine's day. I remember years ago when I was in college and didn't have a special someone it was such a depressing day. I usually went out with a friend, only to see happy couples on dates staring dreamily into each others' eyes, which only made matters worse. After nearly 20 years of marriage it's a nice day, a comfortable day and fun to plan little treats or surprises for Joe and Wilson.

My father has been known to disparage holidays (Mother's day in particular) saying that "every day is Mother's Day". I think what he means is that we should treat Mom in a special way each day, but somehow I don't think that's the case. The way he says it it sounds as though he feels that we spoil mothers on a daily basis and that they don't need a day all their own. You have to know my father to understand his sense of humor, I guess.

So what does Valentine's day really mean? I suppose you'll get as many answers as there are people to ask. We've never gone crazy on the day, usually a special dinner at home or perhaps a meal out, Joe brings me flowers and possibly some chocolate. Just some small tokens to celebrate the holiday. Joe is always great about writing something incredibly thoughtful in a card, he never fails to think of something sweet and sincere to say.

In thinking about my Dad's attitude towards "appreciation" holidays and both Joe and I agree that for the most part we do treat every day as Valentine's day. Not the sickeningly sweet, gazing-into-each-other's eyes type of Valentine's, but the mutual respect, admiration and love type of day that comes with 20 years of marriage. Why wait for one day a year to celebrate when you can do it every day? Live your beliefs every day and see what happens.

Gratitude

I'm going to try to start and end each day thinking about three positive things. In the morning I'll start with things I'm looking forward to that day. They could be as simple as enjoying a cup of coffee outside, listening to the birds, or maybe some retail therapy or getting together with a friend. Each day has hundreds of moments that we could be appreciating, but are often too busy. The yoga class I'm taking on Tuesdays with Mary has a wonderful teacher. She emphasizes mindfulness, being in the moment and appreciating the present. I'm working towards being more conscious of those things.

At the end of the day I'd like to reflect on three things that I'm thankful for. We really are so blessed, though that sounds trite and corny, but compared to so many other cultures and countries, we have SO much. I think much of the time we are on auto pilot, too busy to think about what we have and notice what is around us. Work consumes us, we are always rushing from one task to the next, trying to fit everything in... mindfulness is about slowing down, enjoying the process and living in the moment.

Today I had a luxurious haircut with my stylist, whom I adore. He makes me laugh but is also quite serious at times and we can discuss just about anything under the sun. He has a lot of self-awareness. I also had a wonderful visit with an old friend, whom I've known for 20+ years. We had coffee and talked about our families, mutual friends and how nice it is to have such a long history together. It was great to see him and we made a vow to get together for dinner with our spouses soon. In about a half an hour a friend is coming by with a peony that her mom has divided... apparently, its been in the family for a long time and is quite a special one. I'm honored not only to have her friendship, but now to have a reminder of her in my garden! I can think of many more things that I'm thankful for today, but those were the first to come to mind. How lucky to have so many things to be grateful for!