Monday, September 7, 2009

Bad Cystic

We returned last night from 4 days at Joe's sister's house and oh boy is it good to be home! I don't think my own bed has ever felt so nice. It was a fun-packed, fast-paced good time, although exhausting. We saw 2 concerts, ate out at Reids, Fat Bob's Smokehouse, The Basket Factory, the concession stand at the concert venue, and my personal favorite: Cold Stone Creamery. My sister-in-law and brother in law are wonderful hosts; we had a delicious meal on the night of our arrival and they cheerfully put up with a house full of people despite the chaos.

One of my biggest flaws is not being able to keep up with my treatments when I'm out of my environment. I'm not perfect at home, but am extremely compliant- rarely missing a neb or vest session, dutifully taking supplements, enzymes and exercise on a daily basis. Somehow when I leave home I morph into this non-compliant person who thinks nothing of abusing her body for days at a time. True Confession Time: I didn't do one neb or vest treatment while we were gone. Bad, bad cystic.

Part of it is that I forgot my vest. Doh! I packed the machine, tubing and cord but left the jacket hanging on the back of my chair, which made the rest of the equipment pretty much useless. I did bring my nebs and compressor, but rationalized that while I was skipping my vest I might as well be really bad and skip the nebs, too. Yes, I'm well aware this is downright stupid. I know better. I also know it's going to take me a week or 2 to get back on track after this little holiday from reality.

I'm aware that when I'm on vacation I'm not as good about doing treatments and always vow that "next time" I'm going to be better about it. I suppose that as compliant as I am, there are times I need to take a break from reality and pretend to be a "normal" person, if only for the purpose of realizing that no matter how much I pretend, it'll never be the case. I'll skip treatments and then feel terrible for a number of days, all the while thinking: this was NOT worth it!

I know what I need to maintain my level of functioning: a solid 8 hours of sleep with the Bi-Pap, 2 full vest treatments a day with nebs, frequent, healthy meals -lots of fruits and veggies, plus at least 45 minutes of exercise. Time consuming? Yes. Pain in the ass? Yes. Impossible to do on vacation? No. A challenge, definitely, but nothing that isn't within my reach.

Memo to myself as I work to undo the hopefully-not-permanent damage done while away: no more vacations from reality- the price is too high. Sometimes I really piss myself off.

1 comment:

environmental fiend said...

Kim! I can't believe you, you bad bad cystic. :)

We are all still humans, right? And it's nice to be able to pretend we are "normal" sometimes. I use my vest at home but one thing I do to simplify vacations is to pack my flutter instead (as long as I am feeling well.) It is a lot less hassle and I don't have to do 30 mins of it if I don't want to. I'm a big believer in some is better than none. Besides, I don't know about you but the HS is the biggest thing for me, so as long as I'm doing that I'm able to stay status quo. Not like I am telling you stuff you don't already know...I just think if I can give myself a break during trips, but not completely slack off, that it is a happy medium.

Glad you are back home and hope you are feeling back to normal soon.